A Comic Epic Poem in Prose

No, seriously. You can't step outside without smelling the fire and seeing the ash floating everywhere. My family had to evacuate early yesterday morning, but since they're jerks, they left the cat behind, so I drove home to get her. The main streets were all closed, but I sneaked in through the side streets. She has never left the house in her eight years, so she was pretty upset when I kidnapped her.

Despite having a very angry cat locked in my bedroom, I still managed to have a ton of fun at the Hanson concert last night - barring the stupid drunk blonde bimbo in front of me who kept having her boyfriend pick her up every two minutes. And Tay is still very hot, despite some weird growth on his face.

I had a terrifically epic dream last night. I dreamt that I was part of some Torchwood-like organization that was led by none other than the dashing Captain Jack Harkness. The first part of my dream consisted of some dramatic backstory for me. My great-uncle Bill Nighy (wat lol) was trying to kill me to prevent me from inheriting the family power or something lame like that, so I escaped and joined the Torchwood-like organization under an alias.

We went on a bunch of exciting missions that I can't remember and then decided to take the day off by having a picnic at the local community center. There, we ran across a crazy volleyball coach (he was crazy because his team never won), who turned out to be an alien. He got into a fight with the old couple who ran the community center, so I went in to break up the fight, only to discover that the old man and woman were also aliens! Tadum! Some team member named Mia took the dinosaur eggs the old couple was hiding (I have no idea), and I held them back while Mia escaped to safety. The old lady had super alien strength and kept trying to stab me with a pocketknife. Eventually, Jack came to my rescue, and joked that the old lady only had a pocketknife anyway. I replied that a pocketknife would be a slower, more torturous death.

Somehow, in my dream, this constituted flirting.

Then we were on a new mission, traveling through the desert, until we came upon the lair of a sleeping giant alien spider (this may or may not have to do with the spider that fell on my lap last night and scared the crap out of me). Jack told us to back up slowly so as not to wake her, but of course she woke up anyway. We had to run back through the desert, but there were all these quicksand pits, and people kept falling into them. Most of my teammates and I finally made it to the end of the desert (which was just a door...?), but one girl driving a jeep kept getting cut off by the spider. I remember thinking scornfully that she was the only one with a jeep, yet she couldn't out-drive a spider.

So anyway, brave Jack went running back in to distract the spider so the girl could escape, but he ended up falling into one of the quicksand pits. I decided at this point that I was madly in love with Jack and dashed back to rescue him, but the spider jumped on him first, and they both disappeared under the sand. A few seconds later, his hand popped out (in time with dramatic movie soundtrack music), and I grabbed it and helped him out. I asked him how he had ever managed to wrestle a giant spider in a quicksand pit, and he replied that he had gotten some help. At this point, the black villain guy from Serenity showed up and was like, "Hi, I want to join your organization!" I knew he was a villain because I recognized him from the Serenity movie (lol), but he was like, "This is true; I have been spent to spy on you. But you're going to let me join anyway because I have not yet done anything wrong, and I saved Jack's life." WTF I don't know.

Then Jack and I made out!

Woohoo!

But, alas, it was not to be my Mary-Sue moment, because I realized he wasn't very into it. My mind reasoned, "Oh, it must be because John Barrowman is gay," and I was really disappointed.

THE END.

Stupid cockblocking dreams. D:

Recap of my weekend.

Saturday - Steve, Angela, Kevin, Justin, and my sisters came over for my birthday party. Good times, though not enough people wanted to drink. We played Loaded Questions, Karaoke Revolution, and Guitar Hero. Rock on!

Sunday - Boyfriend took me horseback riding! ♥ The place even let us trot and canter (the horse n00b inside of me was awed)! My horse, Cato, was a darling too. Awww. After that, we decided to go see The Golden Compass because I'm a sucker who will watch anything fantasy. It pretty much sucked and was very disappointing. Never read the books and now am not inspired to at all. The whole movie felt like random scenes picked out and slapped together, and the ending was crap-tastic. It literally felt like they just randomly stopped filming because they felt like it, and that was the end. I later heard that they had chopped off the last three chapters of the book so they could put it in the sequel. WTF?!? I hope they don't make a sequel now because I don't want that to become a lesson to other directors. "Hey! Stopping your movie in the middle of the story is a GREAT ploy to lure audiences!" Uh, no. Just NO.

Positive points of the movie were: Prince Caspian trailer on the big screen (so excited) and Nicole Kidman/Nicole Kidman's wardrobe.

Things I'm not sure about: Inkheart trailer... Brendan Fraser? We shall see.

Then we had TGIF which was delicious.

In other news, I don't really want to go to Nationals, but I feel like I'm not being "supportive" if I don't. So I guess I will. It'd be nicer if it wasn't just me stuck with the parents.

Went to see Live in concert yesterday. After their crappy opening band (who I swear sang 10 different versions of the same song), Live made up for it with a long set list (EIGHT encore songs!) and unflagging energy. In other words, they ROCKED. Ed Kowalczyk, I have to admit, is a big hippie. I've never noticed how many times they use the word "love" in their songs, but Ed sure proved it by going around constantly hugging his bandmates. Their very last song was "Dance With Me", and he made the audience sing a capella while he and his bandmates swung back and forth with their arms around each other. It was all very Kumbayah. But the man has a SEXY, sexy voice, so all is forgiven. And when they want to rock, they can rock.

Highlights include...

"Lakini's Juice": A++++++++++++++++ live. I LOVE that song, and the only way to get the full benefit of its throbbing energy is to hear it live and pounding in your ears. Definitely the highlight of the night.

"The Dolphin's Cry": My favourite Live song and beautifully done.

"Lightning Crashes": Even prettier than the radio version.

"Walk the Line": Live doing any sort of Johnny Cash cover is amusing. I heard later that they performed this with Chris Daughtry on American Idol. If you have this clip, you know you want to send it to me.

And of course the rest of the old favourites were awesome too. They played some of the songs from their new album (coming out in June, folks). Some were iffy, but most were promising. I'll probably get it.

Lowlights: This very FAT chick who kept oozing and oozing her way over until she had somehow managed to shove us several feet to the right and stood right in FRONT of us (even though we had steadfastly staked out the front part of the steps). She totally shoved us out of the way and proceeded to jump up and down and wail and scream and wave her fat arms in front of my face and effectively block out my vision completely.

Then last night, I had some weird dreams. First I dreamt that somehow I had gotten tickets to an exclusive Muse concert, so I took Angela with me. They opened up with "Sunburn", and I remember thinking how fun it was going to be to go home and gloat in my lj about how none of my other Muse fan friends could see them for awhile (AT LEAST I THOUGHT OF YOU GUYS IN MY DREAMS ♥). Then they launched into a very strange, watered-down, semi-acoustic version of "Supermassive Black Hole" (yes, it sounded as weird as it looks).

But WAIT, it gets stranger. Muse announces that they have a guest star, and SEAN BEAN and Matt Bellamy come out in PUNTING OUTFITS. Sean had red and white striped pants and suspenders, while Matt had green and white striped pants and suspenders, and both wore large straw hats. They energetically start singing the Frank Sinatra/Nancy Sinatra duet of "Something Stupid", all the while perched on tall stools, smiling at the audience from beneath their wide brim straw hats. I was so flabbergasted that I watched the entire performance open-mouthed, holding a video camera I got from who-knows-where. When it was finally over, I turned to Angela, who had been playing with her phone the whole time, and went "That was so weird! I didn't know Muse was friends with Sean Bean!" and she looked up and screamed, "SEAN BEAN WAS ON?!?" Then I said it was her fault for not paying attention, and she complained, "Well you know I'm not that into Muse!" WHAT.

Then it switched to another dream where I had gone to New Zealand with Johnny Depp (rofl I wish), and he wrote me a check to cover some of the expenses, and I remember looking at his signature thinking, "People try so hard to get his autograph, and here it is, sent to me because he owes me money! LOL!"

Then suddenly, I was at a farm, desperately trying to feed all the animals on time (on time for what, I don't know), and Frank from UCLA was there, trying to show me how to peel sheets of seeds of this wire fence to satiate the chickens. The chickens were really violent because they were so hungry and kept pecking at me.

Exciting, huh?

I have a job! That doesn't include moronic customers or scanning several hundred loans a day! It does, however, include reading literary gems like "Shayla had a cold she rushed into the bathroom to take medicine but then her throat burned because she had taken the bottle of HAIR DYE instead! She screamed and then died and her brother rushed over and tried to help her but he slipped in the hair dye and became unconscious and drowned in the HAIR DYE the end."

I don't know if I should post where though. Last time I told someone, they laughed their head off for about twenty minutes. With sporadic bouts of hysterics following. *glares at Kevin*

I think I shall drink. To myself. And stuff.

Went to the Hollywood Bowl last night for the Tchaikovsky Spectacular. Mmm, Tchaikovsky owns anyone who ever pitifully tried to dab a note onto a staff. DID YOU HEAR ME? HE IS THE ULTIMATE MUSICAL GENIUS OF ALL TIME! DAMN YOUR UNENLIGHTENED PEASANT EARS IF YOU DISAGREE!

Right.

I'm such a huge music dork. I knew every single note of every single piece they played last night.

Fireworks and cannons going off at the same time rule.

Then arrived home where the scene was not so pleasant. Snobby Sister pissed off Crazy Dad, who ended up unplugging a good number of things in a rage, including the computer, the printer, and the phone. I think I need to move.

Today, had lunch with eag who is just as lovely and entertaining in person. Had the revelation that incest=angst. Picked up a dozen or so snacks, all of the "lots of sugar" type. Then trotted off to work where I take sadistic pleasure in telling kids that I gave no refunds for vending machines, so their puny little $2 allowances were LOST FOREVER. I'm not usually this mean to kids, but they were of the snot-nosed punk variety.

And what is it about the front office that offers this confessional booth air? No less than six people came into the office and ranted and raved about how much one of their co-workers sucked. And today isn't the first day this has happened. I mean, I don't say anything. I don't offer them absolution. I don't even know who they're talking about most of the time. So what's the deal?

Dinner with the gang tomorrow. I should go before my dad finds out I've secretly plugged the computer back in.

So I've come back from my four-day stint in Anaheim for Anime Expo. I'm very, very tired and much, much poorer. I did, however, fulfill my fangirlish dreams of meeting Crispin Freeman and Steven Blum (omg they like touched me when we took picturez!!!11!!1!). Additionally, my Wolf's Rain cast-signed poster is now almost complete (not that anyone cares).

Summary of weekend goes as follows:
Friday - Waited in long-arse line for 5 hours to register, 2 of them in the wrong line. I hate incompetent staffers. Stayed at Steve's and Angela's and decided to give my thirteen-year-old sister alchohol. Played about a hundred different kinds of pokers and lost all my pennies.

Saturday - Dressed AA up as Robin from Witch Hunter Robin. Trying to do her hair was a pain in the neck, but it mostly stayed up. Met up with Angela and Linda and went to a bunch of voice actor panels. Wendee Lee pointed out AA's costume and complimented it. Gathered autographs (Angela asked Justin to stay in line for Steven Blum, who wrote "Yo Angela, Where are you?" on her poster), went to another panel, and tried (successfully) tracking down Crispin Freeman for pictures/autographs/"do you remember us?" questions. I decided I hate loud fangirls, obnoxious fanboys, and more staffers. Went to an hour of AX Idol just for the hell of it. 'Twas amusing. Returned home with Angela.

Sunday - Went to more various panels, which included Crispin singing opera and showing us how Alucard would've sounded with a Romanian accent (wouldn't that have been just cool). Spent half an hour in the karoake room with Linda trying to see if we knew any of the same songs (but didn't). Was blinded by a dancing Man-Faye. Plunkered around on the hotel piano for a bit. I hate the ridiculously high air-conditioning. Went with Justin back to Steve and Angela where we all got slightly tipsy, set off fireworks in the parking lot, and sang karoake until almost 7am.

Monday - Dragged myself up at 10am for more autograph signing and Whose Line is it Anime (slightly lame). Ate lunch and went home. I hate the people who sued McDonald's so that we no longer have super-sized french fries.

That's all of my extravagently exciting life, folks. Yes, this is about as exciting as it gets. *Yawn*

I think I shall see King Arthur tomorrow. Ioan Gruffudd is TEH HOTNESS.

Apparently, my mother is stalking me. Yes, you heard me correctly. My mom is stalking me.

My bank statements still go home since I change apartments every year for college so it's much more convenient to still use the home address as my permanent address. My sister just told me that my mom opened up my bank statement and read through all the charges on my debit card. Much excitement ensued when my mother PULLED OUT A CALENDAR and started looking up all the dates on which I had used the card (which, if you know me, is every day. You can basically trace where I've been the entire month from my bank statement). She then started panicking and hyperventilating when she realized I had used the card *gasp* at the mall in the VALLEY on a WEEKDAY when I possibly couldn't get there by myself on the weekdays since I leave my car at home. OH NO IS NATALIE GOING OUT OF HER APARTMENT ON WEEKDAYS AND COULD IT POSSIBLY BE WITH BOYS?!? Apparently, she had a real fit and proceeded to trace down WHERE I HAD BEEN EVERY SINGLE FREAKIN' DAY!!! Why??? Why did Natalie buy gas on Thursday? Why did Natalie buy clothes on a Wednesday? Why did Natalie go to McDonalds on Sunday?

Good grief, aren't there laws about this?!

The most annoying part is somehow I vaguely feel like I'm in trouble but I haven't the faintest clue WHY I would be. Gah.

I am not a happy camper.

So Justin and I decided to go to Best Buy for the Dominic Monaghan autograph session. He bought a Return of the King DVD, I got a Merry picture, and we were all set. We got there at 10pm, waited nearly 4 hours in a huge line, standing the entire time. Right when we start nearing the Best Buy entrances, they come out going, "We're sorry, but Dom's got a plane to catch."

No freakin' way. In desperation, the remaining crowd gathers around the doors hoping to see the glorious Dom. I myself am among them, pathetically craning my neck hoping for just a glimpse. I do catch a little bit of him, but just as we are all thus pitifully engaged, the Best Buy employees come over and pull down the shutters, effectively shutting us out completely. What the hell? Since we were deprived of an autograph, does that mean we're also automatically stripped of the honor of seeing him? I'm grateful that Dom was kind enough to stay an hour later than he was supposed to, and I'm grateful he was so kind as to talk with every freakin' fan in front of us and give them hugs, but since I am not in the group, I'm going to be selfish and state that I was very pissed off.

I am still very pissed.

There goes my entire evening. And for once, I was actually planning to do work.

Once again, folks, Natalie is not a happy camper. Remember, she likes to be rewarded when she waits in line.

I now retire to my room of puny mortals to brood in silence.

Had an awesome weekend. Thanks to BB's connections, we all got nice tickets to Champions on Ice at the Pond, and Angela got to come along too! The show was great fun. I love the Chinese pairs' program the most, but everyone was pretty good. Lots of mistakes going on, but eh, it's the off season, so what can you expect? Sasha, as much as I don't like her, had the *perfect* exhibition program for herself, and it was absolutely adorable. Michelle Kwan and Josh Groban music always make for a VERY nice mix. Got stripped at by Philippe Candeloro and Dan Hollander (in very different ways). I've also realized that I now have a strange infatuation for younger gay men. Disturbing? Yes. But I can't help it! Johnny Weir is just way too darn cute. I snapped a picture of him when we were backstage with applaudable fangirlish frenzy. I also got to take a picture with Shen and Zhao (yay!), Evgeny Plushenko (boy was Angela happy), Timothy Goebel (*squee*), and Philippe Candeloro (mostly because he was last to come out, and I wanted to get rid of the rest of my film; I hope he didn't hear me saying that). Timmy Goebel actually went up to BB and said "Hi, sweetie! How have you been?" and hugging and kissing her while Angela and I stared in red-faced envy. Just as we were about to leave, some ladies recognized BB and we got swarmed by a small crowd of autograph-seekers, which Angela and I found vastly amusing and very cool. It's always nice to live vicariously.

On to sadder news, Justin called to tell me that my hamster Pippin died last night (he stays at Justin's because I can't keep him at my apartment this year). :-( Poor MEHOD, he was really a king amongst hamsters. Maybe all the steak that Justin gave him was bad cholestrol for his old age, but at least he died happy. I'm really sad that I didn't get to see him in his last few days; he was really quite adorable, and I've got lots of memories associated with him when Angela and I would secretly hide him in the dorms...

R.I.P. Pippin!

I'm exceptionally tired right now. I've gotten an average of 2-3hrs of sleep a day this entire week because of my blessed allergies, and I think it's finally caught up to me. This morning it literally hurt to open my eyes. And yet, I'm in the computer lab right now instead of sleeping in the library as I originally planned. Ah well.

Spring break was fun. I would so relaxing, but considering I got almost no sleep... Thursday we wanted to go to make a one-day road trip to Vegas, but of course 2hrs out from the city, we find out there's been a 66 car pileup and the way is COMPLETELY closed off (well, duh). So we make our way back and decide to huff it to Magic Mountain where of course there was sudden unexpected rainfall. Did I do something really bad to deserve this karma? Anyway, it was all still fun, despite the fact that we spent half an hour looking for the ride X, spent another half an hour waiting in line (it takes them literally 10 minutes to load a car! Efficiency, thy name is not Magic Mountain), and then of course the ride ran into "technical difficulties" and we had to leave. Stupid bad luck.

So my dumb question of the day: There's a Lady Luck, so is there a Lady Bad Luck? Or does Lady Luck dish out both good and bad? Or is bad just the absence of her wondrous presence? Or is Bad Luck her drunk, no-good husband with whom she argues with all the time?

No sleep makes you loopy.

Movie Partners (Girls Only!) by churchbabe
Your Username
Lord of the Rings Partner	Theoden
Star Wars Partner	Yoda
Pirates of the Caribbean Partner	Will Turner
Finding Nemo Partner	Bubbles
Harry Potter Partner	Charlie Weasley
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

Why are they all so OLD? Theoden King, with his sparkly new Two Towers makeover? Charlie Weasley? (Well, I'm sure the dragons will be fun) Will Turner and his exceptional blandness? (As long as I get to hang out with his friend Jack...) YODA? *falls over*

This is pointless. Time to write fun Hellsing torture stories.